Hello blog.
It's been almost two years since my last post.

We're exactly half way through 2015 now..
I'm almost 2 months older than 28 years of age.

The most significant events in 2014 was my 외할아버지 (故이산도) passing in May and 친할머니 (故김복랑) passing in late November. Also, Sarang moved to the United Kingdom in July 2014 after spending 3 months in Korea staying at 삼층 - 외할머니네.

Throughout the course of last year, I remember struggling to find a balance between a full time job and assisting mum with her studies at Laidlaw College (2nd year of Bachelor of Christian Theology). I remember being upset for disappointing mum because I felt I didn't have the capacity in me to help her as she wanted. I recall beginning to belief that she and I are quite different in the ways that we think in certain things. More so, when I spent time with dad discussing various topics, I learnt he was a logical thinker and was very philosophical. My only concern was his faith and the lack of stability.

It was devastating to hear of 외할아버지's passing. I remember mum receiving a call from Korea from Sarang, her cry and calling for '엄마...' followed by the news had mum screaming and kicking out her pain. I couldn't even hold her in my arms because I knew that would not alleviate the situation in the slightest. Instead I watched her clutch her head, crying out her pain and cried out my sadness and disbelief also.

Mum, 제형삼촌, 숙모, 희정이모 and 이모부 all flew out the next day and it was just me 정필 and Patrick left in NZ - knowing not how to deal with the various emotions.

I remember meeting with Leo in hope that we could alleviate our pains by talking about 외할아버지 and the events that were then happening in Korea but I couldn't help but feel like I needed to also be in Korea with my family. In the end, after the funeral had taken place, I applied for leave from school and was granted a 5 day paid leave including two weekends.

When November came, and dad had gotten several calls from uncles about 친할머니's deteriorating health and sense of urgency, dad flew out except, he missed his flight the first time because his passport had expired..the same day of his flight, I met him in the city to help him save time in applying for an emergency application of a passport, I wrote 친할머니 a letter thanking her for the love and teachings she had given me, thanking her for everything she has done for dad and mum, and telling her how beautiful she is and my hope to meet her in Heaven. Dad said he'd read it to her a few days before she passed. I also had my last meeting with her through Skype, where I saw her still body and frail spirit. I burst into tears as I saw that she was very different from when I last saw her well and talking (although dad had sent me several pictures of her lying in bed) but dad calmed me down and told me to say what I have to say clearly. I don't remember much of what I said, it was a difficult and alien situation where I had to say my goodbyes to a dying family. I remember saying to her that I love her and that I will live to the fullest and make her proud, because I always knew 친할머니 was a hard working, ambitious woman. She was tough, sometimes so tough that I really craved more of a motherly side to her. But life makes people the way they are and also their innate character - 친할머니 had diabetes for almost her entire life, and she had lived as a widow for more than 20 years. She had been through tough financial struggles as well as other various obstacles in life. It makes me think, that her life, and many people's lives can be very dense with lots of complexities and hardships.

Another significant mark in 2014 was Sarang and I investing into our first house. We made a 5% deposit into a $550k house and land package in Warkworth. It had four bedrooms, two living areas, two bathrooms, a deck and a huge backyard, a double garage and a red front door. It was excitement itself and something that marked Sarang and I different from every other mid to late 20 year old. I definitely enjoyed the responses I got when I told people about our first investment, it made me feel grown up and clever.

In hindsight, it was God that lead us into this blessing. God promised He'd make our paths straight and I feel in a lot of ways He has done just that. The family has recovered significantly financially, we're finding new challenges and adventures. We're learning more about ourselves and God.

I've been preparing to go to the UK since a while ago now. After much thought, I applied and got granted a Refresher's Leave from Rangitoto College - much to all my colleagues' surprise as the policy goes that a teacher must work at least 5 years at a school to be considered for the leave. It was much easier to apply knowing that I was and am quite determined to leave regardless of the result. All because I know that I am at a critical stage in my life where I personally feel I need to get out and see more of the world as opposed to settling. I also felt I wanted to explore the art and design in Europe to gain in knowledge and insight so that I would be able to enrich my teaching.

At this moment in time, I am happy to be at Rangitoto College and it was such a dilemma until the point of finally deciding that I would leave at the beginning of 2016 as the students at Rangitoto College are my joy. Aside from a few bullshit from the department (something I've matured in as well is dealing with different characters and philosophies of fellow colleagues) and frustrations around all the administrative requirements (teachers wish they had more time to make resources and enrich their teaching!) Rangitoto College is a special school to me and I have really fallen in love with many of the students here..

Now,

I must wrap it up here. I am hungus Angus right now and I meant to come into the office (Sunday today) to work on my design portfolio - mind you, it is taking quite the time to get it rolling!

ps. I began sponsoring another boy Shibam from India. Sarang and I began attending Windsor Park Baptist church in early January 2014 before she left for Korea in March and I ended up moving to St Paul's Anglican church in September (due to the demographic of the Young Adults community being younger than I'd hoped) but have made some valuable friends from both churches.